Contemplations

The first three months of every year always finishes too quickly. Soon this feeling of elation and the whisper of brand new adventures will quickly dwindle to broken promises, could have been’s, and ‘shit-why-didn’t-I-do-that’-s.

But luckily it’s still January, and I’m in a fairly good mood. Lots of plans still to come, and many more in the making. And recently I came across some good news that got me giggling like a giddy school girl (although, admittedly.. I do tend to giggle quite easily.)

So while I’m happy.. I thought I’d write about things I’m thankful for.

My two years worth of work experience – yes, in total. Because I’m a lazy bum, and although the idea of part-timing occurred to me, I never needed it so I never went through with it. Ain’t I a privileged b*tch? – will happen in a month and a bit. March 1^st to be precise. I was lucky enough to stumble upon a first job where I learnt lots of valuable lessons and got to meet an amazing group of people who made me laugh, who would skive off work with me, and were hilarious to boot. I miss them all terribly now that I’m not entirely in love with all my co-workers in my current office. But that gripe is for my private conversations, and not the internet’s legion of ghost-faces, and creepy stalkers.

I fully realize how much a lazy-bum I am, and although I do try very hard to change it – it’s not happening quickly enough. So my work experience has largely been filled with pleasant surprises where people trust me enough to get on and work my mojo on various things I’m supposed to handle. Yes, I’ve had mini breakdowns where I thought it’d be best if I quit and never force my incompetent ways on the innocent work-force of Indonesia ever again, and days when all I wanted to do was smear mud all over people faces and stomp on their thighs (because thigh-stomping sounds more vicious than feet-stomping, but not as violent as face-stomping.).. But on the whole, I’ve never been so stressed that I ended up crying in the middle of a busy road, wailing for someone to please save me.. And I think.. I’m pretty chuffed. I’m not where I wished I was, but it’s good. Better than good in fact.. I’m in a great place right now.

I look around at my best friends, and can honestly say that while we’re not all ecstatic about where we are, with varying degrees of frustration.. We’re at least learning to walk on our own two feet. Looking back.. These people I grew up with, who I shared showerless weeks with, who wondered about our vague collective future with.. Look how far we’ve come. :)