Enlightenment is hours upon hours of traffic jam preventing you from getting to a toilet, and finding a song which suddenly washes out every single worry you have going on in your head for a moment, while peace descends gracefully like a warm cloak, enveloping you in its warmth.
Its realizing that nothing is worth tearing your hair out over, and that nasty crushing feeling in your heart can be released in one big whoop. A loud obnoxious burst of noise from your own throat.
.. Until you suddenly cuss loudly because of the damned bus that almost ran your beautiful beat up, battered car down.
But its true. Today's Traffic Jam Enlightenment Moment is delivered to you by The Boy Least Likely To. I do love their soothing sounds, even the more upbeat tunes never fail to make me sigh in happy relief.
the shadow of a hill that saved us, from the glare of the summer, its harsh, beating rays, your hands in mine, my heart in yours, forever didn't sound so frightening.
I miss being head over heels in love - throwing all caution to the wind just to feel that upside-down, inside-out, burst of emotion that makes everything else pale and fade in comparison. I miss risking taking my guards down and feeling like maybe its safe to keep them down. Blurting out my incoherent thoughts and half baked ideas, just to hear someone respond in positive, an indulgent smile on their face.
To be fair I never had it all - the one ex I treasured turned out to be a bit of a bastard as time passed by.. but you know what.. that's besides the point. For once it isn't about him.
I miss being in love with someone who is far from perfect, but is just right for me.
What does it say about me that I would rather suffer amnesia and wake up a blank slate, to correcting my many, many faults manually, with hard work?
It would help if I had a huge closet full of pretty shoes, a job with a decent salary that I quit, savings to live off, an ex who lives with me in my awesome apartment, a gorgeous clothes. See? Amnesia doesn't sound half bad if I had it like Samantha Newly from Samantha Who! Yes I know she's a fictional character, and I should be old enough to want to be my own person instead f a fictional person-type thing!
*whine, whine, whine*
I know its not getting me anywhere.
I HATE MY THESIS!
Lies of course, I love my baby. Despite the stress.. The long hours of correspondence.. The stress.. The typing.. No actually, I do genuinely like the typing. And the topic I picked really is interesting for me.. And I don't so much mind the stress.
And its not like I'm not used to staying up at all hours.
So really there's nothing for me to complain about!
... Ah the gentle self discovery of idiots. Well, at least its amusing to watch.
So.. I'm leaving livejournal, which sort of ruins the whole 'keeping this one purely for my photos' thing I had going on, but I'm a fickle, fickle creature! Haha! I prolly will still log in there though, as there are too many people I'm still watching and commenting on. But yes.
I will probably do my primary rants here. And reviews. And the photos! Oh the picture postings will continue. Because I like pimping myself out like that.
Don't look at me like I'm strange.
*twirls and bows and hops out in what I hope is a flattering fashion*